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 What Made Me Me

Long ago and far away,
        In a land that time forgot,
 Before the days of Dylan,
        Or the dawn of Camelot.
There lived a race of innocents,
        And they were you and me,
 Long ago and far away
        In the Land That Made Me Me.

 Oh, there was truth and goodness
         In that land where we were born,
 Where navels were for oranges,
         And Peyton Place was porn.
 For Ike was in the White House,
         And Hoss was on TV,
 And God was in His heaven
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

 We learned to gut a muffler,
         We washed our hair at dawn,
 We spread our crinolines to dry
         In circles on the lawn
 And they could hear us coming
         All the way to Tennessee,
 All starched and sprayed and rumbling
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

We longed for love and romance,
         And waited for the prince,
 And Eddie Fisher married Liz,
         And no one's seen him since.
 We danced to "Little Darlin",
         And Sang to 'Stagger Lee'
 And cried for Buddy Holly
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

 Only girls  girls wore earrings then,
         And three was one too many,
 And only boys wore flat-top cuts,
         Except for Jean McKinney.
 And only in our wildest dreams
         Did we expect to see
 A boy named George, with Lipstick
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

 We fell for Frankie Avalon,
         Annette was oh, so nice,
 And when they made a movie,
         They never made it twice
 We didn't have a Star Trek Five,
         Or Psycho Two and Three,
 Or Rockey-Rambo Twenty
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

 Miss kitty had a heart of gold,
         And Chester had a limp,
 And Reagan was a Democrat
         Whose co-star was a chimp.
 We had a Mr. Wizard,
         But not a Mr T,
 And Oprah couldn't talk, yet
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

Wehad our share of heroes,
         We never thought they 'd go,
 At least not Bobby Darin,
         Or Marilyn Monroe.
 For youth was still eternal,
         And life was yet to be,
 And Elvis was forever,
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

We'd never seen the rock band
        That was Grateful to be Dead,
 And Airplanes weren't named Jefferson,
         And Zeppelins weren't Led.
 And Beatles lived in gardens then,
         And Monkees in a tree,
 Madonna was a virgin
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

 We'd never heard of Microwaves,
         Or telephones in cars,
And babies might be bottle-fed,
         But they weren't grown in jars.
 And pumping iron got wrinkles out,
         And 'gay' meant fancy-free,
 And dorms were never coed
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

We hadn't seen enough of jets
         To talk about the lag,
 And microchips were what was left at
         The bottom of the bag.
 And Hardware was a box of nails,
         And bytes came from a flea,
 And rocket ships were fiction
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

 Buicks came with portholes,
         And side shows came with freaks,
 And bathing suits came big enough
         To cover both your cheeks.
 And Coke came just in bottles,
         And skirts came to the knee,
 And Castro came to power
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

 We had no Crest with Fluoride,
         We had no Hill Street Blues,
 We all wore superstructure bras
         Designed by Howard Hughes.
 We had no patterned pantyhose
         Or Lipton herbal tea
 Or prime-time ads for condoms
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

 There were no golden arches,
         No Perriers to chill,
 And fish were not called Wanda,
         And cats were not called Bill.
 And middle-aged was thirty-five
         And old was forty-three,
 And ancient was our parents
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

 But all things have a season,
         Or so we've heard them say,
 And now instead of Maybelline
         We swear by Retin-A.
 And they send us invitations
         To join AARP,
 We've come a long way, baby,
         From the Land That Made Me Me.

 So now we face a brave new world
         In slightly larger jeans,
 And wonder why they're using
         Smaller print in magazines.
 And we tell our children's children
         Of the way it used to be,
 Long ago, and far away
         In the Land That Made Me Me.

 --Author unknown--


My Prayer -- The Platters
In the still of the night -- The Five Satins
And many others from 1956!

For Arkansas Dave and his friends at Poplar Bluff High